Coach Polly Mertens: 0:22

Hey superstars welcome back, polly here and Sam Pruitt, what’s up, beautiful humans.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 0:27

Hey girlfriend. What are we talking about today?

Coach Polly Mertens: 0:31

Oh, we’re talking about one of our favorite subjects, but I really was thinking that we probably say that every episode. Actually, we do. We have a lot of favorites. That’s what we’re doing here is sharing our favorites, right, but anything under the realm of leadership and teamwork is the biggest bucket that we play in and specifically, what’s?

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 0:51

today’s topic being an A-team player. Oh, being an A-team player. And in our world, you know, we like to play with the A-team as team. Awesome, you know the A-team is, you’re on the awesome team and this can mean any team. You know, as we were preparing for this episode, I mean literally, we said a team is as small as two and it could be huge. Right, it could be family team, work team, sports team, community leader, whatever you’re doing, right?

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 1:17

So, as you listen to this, I hope people will obviously expand this and make it personal for themselves. We’re probably going to lean a little bit more in the realm of business or you know, your career or the work team, but I think we’ll interplay some ideas and examples from the world of sport, possibly family. We don’t know where this is going to exactly go, but team is anything that’s you and another person, right, like you and I. We’ve talked about how you know we’re sort of a team of two right now, even though our listeners, we feel like they’re team awesome, we’re all on team awesome, but it’s anything. So let’s get us started. My dear what?

Coach Polly Mertens: 1:52

should we talk about? Let’s get started. Well, let’s talk specifically about what. When we say a team player, we don’t mean a team player like just anybody Lowercase. Yeah, exactly, we mean the capital A. So an A team player, specifically, what is that? Let’s define that for our audience and then we will tell them a little bit more about why that’s important and how they could become one.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 2:21

Yeah, and I know you, you have a wonderful list, so I want you to kick us out a list, yeah, and to you know, and just as you listen to these things, listen for where in your life a team has been who you are, or maybe now, if there’s a gap, just listen for where me, where maybe the gap is, and are you called to reach for it? Right, cause that’s part of what we’re going to get to at the end is, like your best, your bestest, if you will, like your personal best, is a team, right, and I think we all, as humans, have an innate desire to live our potential, be our best. So share with me, share with us. Like what is a team to you, my dear? How do we define it?

Coach Polly Mertens: 3:02

What does an A team player look like? How do we define it? What does an 18 player look like? How do they live their life? What are they an example of? So a big element is they have clarity of their values. Clarity of their values. Something else they have that you speak of frequently is they have standards by which they operate their life, not just their work life, their entire life. So they have clarity of values that they live by and they have operational standards by which they live. Can you define the standard part for us?

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 3:38

Well, so standards are. It’s like those I like in it. When I think of teams, I think of what we call a code of conduct, right, it’s like the operating system or what will you allow or not allow? Like, what are you okay with? You know sort of the. It can be compassion, it can be camaraderie, you know things that you value, like, like values sort of fit into that. But it’s also at the individual level, right. So our standards are like what do you hold yourself to in terms of behavior, habits, patterns, how do you show up in the world, if you will Like, what are your standards of ways of being? How about you?

Coach Polly Mertens: 4:28

Yeah Well, I was thinking. The one I preempted that with was values, and maybe some people don’t when we say that ever so loosely. We might want to clearly define that as well. So examples of values are I believe in being a disciplined person, so I operate my life in a way that is disciplined. Not everybody wants to have that kind of lifestyle. They might not be something that they value. I value my freedom, I value my honesty, I value other humans and have compassion for the other humans in my life. So my personal value system is something I carry with me in the world and I bring into the workspace, into the team space. So it’s important that people do have clarity around their values and, like we also said that you just stated, their standards of operation or how they are going to show up in the world. So two of these things are important for people to come into the team with their own personal clarity on.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 5:30

And I don’t even think that. So it took me I was probably in my late 30s or 40s before I ever did a values exercise. So what I want to just make clear for people is you have values, whether or not you know and are clear about them. Like it’s sort of like you grow up and the way of operating in the world shows us your values, whether you know like, oh, like you said, I’m a disciplined person. You are a disciplined person. That’s your opera, you know, you can label that because that’s how you see the world, built upon values and beliefs, if you will right. Like that. You’ve earned that, you’ve know, found your way to things like that, things that you’ve seen success with or haven’t seen success. But there’s, everybody is operating with a set of values, whether they know it or not. And what I love, what I think is important and what I think helps people guide and live a life that’s intentional and deliberate, is, as you said, being clear about your values and living into them. Because when we’re A living someone else’s values, we’re totally getting off another topic here. But you know, I just wanted to emphasize, like, even if you don’t think you have values, you do. It’s just your values list and honestly, I’ve seen this in workshops I’ve done. Tony Robbins does a great process for this.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 6:41

If you don’t have your values in a priority order that makes the most sense for you, you could be driving yourself. That could lead to burnout, that could lead to dissatisfaction in your life. You may value something, but you’ve got the order Like. So, for a quick example, if you have success as your number one success meaning like financial success or like crushing it in business as your number one, value and health as number three, that could be disaster, it could be okay, it could be disastrous. But if you inverted those and you had health as number one, which is mine, success in business is number three, let’s say, think about how the life, the trajectory of that life, could change dramatically for that person. So just you know, a little tangent there. But there we go.

Coach Polly Mertens: 7:25

So values but the reason we’re saying this, and the reason it’s important we do take this little moment up front to kind of set the stage on values and standards, is this is how you make decisions right, these are the things you think through, these are your emotional reactions, these are how you make decisions and actions that you bring into the team environment. Yeah, you’re non-negotiables.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 7:48

You’re not non-negotiables.

Coach Polly Mertens: 7:49

Exactly, exactly, and how you are not only showing up in the team environment, but how you’re influenced by the external things happening in the team the other people, their own, you know experiences and whatever, and everything that’s going on in that environment. So if you can come in from a place of knowing thyself and being aware of your own value system and standards, you can come into the space and operate at a very different level. So we’re just setting a foundational stage here, if you will. True, true, true. Other things that make an A-team player accountability.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 8:29

Non-negotiable, non-negotiable.

Coach Polly Mertens: 8:31

Accountability, being willing to be held accountable. Holding yourself accountable, yeah, and being willing to be held accountable, really understanding the power of collaboration and being willing to seek it out. Be hungry for it Almost. I mean, I’m hungry for it, you’re hungry for it, like we understand. Oh my gosh, we can do really cool things. But if we can find the right collaboration, nevermind cool things, how about next fricking level?

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 9:02

You know, and something I just want to insert, like, okay, this is gonna be slightly tangential, but I can’t help but go forward without saying it is you and I have really discovered as coaches we would say and, and working together. You know, our collaboration is the power of another brain working together with you all the collaboration whatever.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 9:22

It’s like you can see further. You can see things that are blind spots, you are better problem solvers. The vision gets bigger or more clear, or like like the two brains just talk, talk, talk back and forth. You know however short or long the session is, man, it’s just like so much more can get built if, like two hands, two brains are working on that thing than just one right.

Coach Polly Mertens: 9:48

Exactly, you just doubled the creativity. But something that I know we don’t talk about a lot on this show but I’m sure we’ll get to at a later date and you’re very, very hot on is the energetic aspect of humans the individual and then the collective right and that energy exchange that happens. So now we’re kind of selling people on why they should want to be on a team. But, like you’re a human made of energy and so am I. So if you put several humans together, the amount of energy that is created now that can obviously turn into a negative energy. But we’re not talking about that right now. We’ll get to that at the end. What not to do. But right now what we’re saying is if you bring that energy together and it becomes a collective power I mean, I don’t say it’s like double, it becomes, you know, tenfold or hundredfold if you really start magnifying and operating the team environment at the highest possible.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 10:44

Yeah, a thousand percent. Yeah, okay, well, I’m going to want you to get through your list. I keep wanting to go off on little things, but let’s get it out there.

Coach Polly Mertens: 10:51

Well, I just use the term and a lot of people will be familiar with it. But you know, be a GSD, be a GSD. A GSD is get shit done person. A person who gets shit done is a gsd. Yeah, own that. Show up to the party and be a gsd. Do the work like be all in task master.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 11:14

Yeah, reliable, you know. Hold yourself accountable, like not just thinking about it, talking about it, emailing about it, but like doing it, doing it yeah and again.

Coach Polly Mertens: 11:24

This is like what is it? It’s when you bring a group of gsts together again, unstoppable unstoppable, and that’s the life we want to be living. Okay, let’s get in. Well, we already started touching on. Why should we want to be on this? Why would you not want to be on one? I mean, are you kidding?

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 11:43

Yeah, the other thing I want to say I just want to insert into being a team player and this I think this is like part of maybe this is a nice transition into the why is so one of my big things from looking at great teams and so, like I don’t know if you’ve seen the documentary about Michael Jordan’s whole experience, right, and they interview all you know lots of his teammates over the years, michael Jordan being an amazing basketball player, right now beautifully retired, you know, wonderful human, but he was one of the early people in that sport to take it next level.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 12:18

I mean not that Magic Johnson or Larry Bird, you know historical, but like his next levelness, like at the time people, just you know historical, but like his next level-ness, like at the time people, just you know there’s all this magic around him and one of the things that I get from seeing him is a teammate being their best. And so when that person is committed to their personal best and if every person on that team is committed to their personal best, what I find is the inspiration from standing next to someone being their personal best makes, like you were talking about, that collaboration, the inspiration, like it magnifies the energy right back to that person. Do you know? Do you know what I do? Are you picking up what I’m getting? It’s like when.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 13:03

I feel it it’s a fuel source, yeah, yeah so. So Michael Jordan was singularly focused on being his absolute best and he would only, you know, allow around him absolute best people around him. And I think when somebody is being their best and you’re not being your best, you have an opportunity to see something for yourself. Like, do I want to step up and be my best, or step off, or step away, or step off this team if you will, because I think, eventually, what starts to happen is if 18 players don’t see other team, 18 players on the team, they either call them on it you know, that’s that code of conduct or it just makes it obvious that they need to go, you know.

Coach Polly Mertens: 13:47

So let’s repeat that and we did mention this in our first episode on this series is that A-team players want to be with A-team players.

Coach Polly Mertens: 13:55

Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah. And it doesn’t mean that you need to be, you know, if there’s some application, am I an A, b or C? And am I, you know, do I have to be wanted and, you know, accepted by others or rejected, whatever the dynamic is? That’s not what we’re talking about here. It’s if you see 18 players, you innately, as a human being this is a survival instinct You’re excited by it.

Coach Polly Mertens: 14:21

Yeah, you’re drawn to it because you too want to not only survive evolutionary, but like, thrive in this one life, one body that you were gifted. So you gravitate towards it and you can then step up into it, accepting the opportunity and really tapping into the energy to rise yourself up to that place. Right, you don’t have to say, well, let me really work on myself till I’m perfect, which is BS and then I’ll drop myself into applying to be on that team. Right, I’ll go to the tryouts, I’ll apply for the job. You know, I’ll eventually do those things. Bs. Start right now, today, in this moment. If you have determined you want to become and fully embrace the opportunity to be an AT player and start doing the work, it will happen when you surround yourself.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 15:14

So quick story. So two things I think about with that. First is, um, so being an AT player and recognizing it, and then a second story I want to share, just so I’m saying this so that you can help me remember. To get to the second part is sitting in the stew. So the first story.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 15:29

So I had been a volleyball player since I was 14 and fast forward 20 something years and you know I’m now quote a mature volleyball player. You know, past the days of college, long past paying in my twenties into my thirties, and I had an opportunity. I was like, oh, you know, I want to find a women’s volleyball team and play on it, you know, at night, recreationally, and stuff. So I go to the gym where I had heard that volleyball was being played in my area and as soon as I walked in I was like like I just was like who’s the best team here? Like I just looked around and I watched and I saw it and I was like, oh, that’s the best team. I walked up to them afterward, you know politely, but you know a little confident I was like you know, I want to be on your team.

Coach Polly Mertens: 16:13

You need me.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 16:15

So here’s the fast forward story. They didn’t see it in me. They were like oh, we’re full up, you know, so be it Right, like an 18 already. So somehow I don’t even remember the exact fast forward, but I either that night found a couple other ladies. Whatever, we formed a team. We won successfully. Every other, the ladies that that night I found, we won. We were undefeated for years. For like four years I was like I always on the 18, you know?

Coach Polly Mertens: 16:43

Okay, but that’s an even better story because you didn’t put your tail between your legs and say I was rejected by the A team. And therefore I am not worthy. Oh, you said I’m going to create the damn thing myself.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 16:57

Yeah, somehow it’s going to form. And I did, and we exactly. Yeah, it was. And I was like how did we come together? Like I don’t even remember where we were, whatever, but it was like, and we were so successful, like it was I love it. That was beautiful I love it.

Coach Polly Mertens: 17:12

That is beautiful. That’s the lesson. There’s so many lessons in that Wow.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 17:17

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Coach Polly Mertens: 17:18

What was the sitting in the stew one?

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 17:20

Sitting in the stew is, I think, about times where I’ve been in companies, businesses, short term or you know, maybe in younger years or whatever, when I didn’t see myself as the A-team right and just people, kind of just buying time inside of a job, Like forgive me if you’re in working any kind of government work or whatever, but that feels like a place when I know people or have seen people in that just you know, punching in, punching out, right, and that stew of normalcy or average level or this is how it’s always been done here just pollutes and it’s toxic, if you ask me, and that’s where I could never.

Coach Polly Mertens: 18:00

I’m just going to call something out. That happens a lot in families. This is just how this is. It’s that acceptance of this is how it’s going to be. It’s like good and the term good enough comes up.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 18:18

Yeah. You know, relationships that have, you know they’ve gone past their expiration date, you know, and it’s like rotten people just kind of hanging out Right, or a family just kind of accepting it’s a level of normalcy, of dysfunction or whatever Mediocre mediocrity and just yeah, yeah. So like, but boom, we’re like here. No more of that, no more of that.

Coach Polly Mertens: 18:46

Well, you only get one chance. Who in the hell would be wasting time? But I know people can be stuck and this definitely this session today is a call to action to say enough and step out of it. Well, at the end we’re going to unpack a little bit of, maybe, what not to do and how to get out of it. A couple more things about why you mentioned cross motivation. So that’s being with teammates and collaborators. We’re like fired up, fired up baby. I said in the last podcast when we were speaking to leaders in this same context, but specifically to the leaders of the teams camaraderie is food for the soul, dang. And I said and I still I could survive in the desert off of this, you know, and the occasional ice cube. Camaraderie feeds you and we need it. Humans need to feel a sense of belonging, being with one another, being seen, being heard, being respected, like we need this. It is food for our soul.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 19:52

So camaraderie is just like man yeah, without it, yeah it’s like it’s like physical touch to the human, you know. It’s like a human body dies a slow death without connection. Uh, human touch, those sorts of things and I think team slash person in you know an environment we die a slow death in a family or in a business or something like that, where there’s lack of connection. My big word is buy-in, you know, and we can cover that. I think we’re going to do a big episode on buy-in and how to form it and stuff like that. But like when we’re all bought into it, it’s like it feeds us, we feed it. You know it’s like sustainability us, we feed it. It’s like sustainability the definition right there the more we give, the more we get. The more we give, the more we get from it, type of thing.

Coach Polly Mertens: 20:39

Well, and that’s what camaraderie is. It’s connection, right, it’s a sense of connection to one another, it’s a sense of connection to oneself. I belong here, I am being of purpose, of service to the greater good. I mean, come on, people. And then another thing uh, that’s really powerful and a reason to want to be an 18 player is you build resiliency because you have this core group of people, your team mates and ideally, your team leader, who are all in with you, and so you do really challenging things. You stare things in the face every day and it’s fun for you, like you thrive off of it, and so you build resiliency. I’m not saying you win everything, that’s not what I’m saying here, but you get up time and time again and you continue to go into the arena and you build resiliency.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 21:32

Yeah, I think about you know we’ve talked a little bit about that movie, about the women’s soccer play. You know the going for the gold and stuff. Or you know the cup and you know their standard was win every game and they didn’t right Big spoiler. But whatever, they didn’t win every game. But I think you know, you’ve heard, I remember hearing this when I was in my early twenties. It’s like, well, you know, date someone or be with somebody, but don’t marry somebody until you’ve been through some crap. You know, like, go through some tough times with somebody and then you know who you’re dealing with right, and then you know what you have together. And I think teams that grow together through tough times not every time is a win. That makes them stronger, they understand something about each other, they’re learning right.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 22:18

And one of the things I wanted to touch upon that you were saying is like that camaraderie. I think an element of camaraderie is progress or growth, right, like they’re inching along or maybe leaping forward, whichever individually and as a team, like the momentum is building. It’s not just grow and plateau. I don’t think camaraderie is let’s just stay here, like let’s get to X and then always and we’ll just maintain X. I think camaraderie is also built upon. Let’s grow and progress to see how far we can go, how far we can progress with this right.

Coach Polly Mertens: 22:53

Well, a healthy dynamic is created in this petri dish of humans, if you will, where fostering growth and challenge with each other is expected. So you would challenge me to pursue a higher level and I would do the same for you and we would support each other in that way, without judgment and criticism and all the dysfunctional things that can happen. We just say, hey, we going. Yeah, we have no idea how to do this, but are you coming with me? We’ll figure this out Right.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 23:23

Yeah, I think that exactly what he says. That healthy level of you know, uh, it’s like they talk about back in the day of like gladiators and stuff. You know it’s like they talk about back in the day of like gladiators and stuff. You know they, they would not want to. You know it’s like what do they say? Don’t play tennis with somebody who’s less than you, play it with somebody who’s better than you and they challenge you kind of thing, right.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 23:42

So you know, being on a team where you’re both seeing each other’s wins and you know maybe falling a step back, but you grow to after that you know and recognizing like hey, I see you, like you didn’t, you didn’t hit that goal, or you didn’t make that basket, or you know you didn’t complete that contract, or something like that. That’s OK. Ok, let’s, let’s find a way to you know next, next, and keep going and supporting each other for shooting baskets, supporting each other for going for our gold, our best, our winning, whatever expression is in the world.

Coach Polly Mertens: 24:13

Sports analogy. We’re both training for Ironmans right now. If we ride every week with people who are slower than us and maybe don’t have the leg strength or the cardiovascular fitness et cetera, et cetera, can’t do the miles whatever, what are we doing? I’m not saying that that occasional recreational social ride is unhealthy. It’s great for your mental health. It has some physical benefits. Will it make you a better athlete Ultimately? Yeah, that’s not how that works. Right, and the same is true for any work environment, family environment. Just, that’s just not how it works. You got to be able to step up your game.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 24:53

A hundred percent. I think that goes to what you’re saying like shared values, shared vision in the beginning. Yeah, yeah, so that’s, that’s a key component. We’ll we’ll get into that another time, but yeah.

Coach Polly Mertens: 25:02

So many things Okay. So how do people become this really prize opportunity for their lifetime? How did they become an A-team player?

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 25:16

I’ll say one thing, but I know you’ve got lots of juice on this.

Coach Polly Mertens: 25:19

First they get a tattoo that says Everyday Awesome Project on their back.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 25:24

Oh, sorry, Contact. That’s for the logo. We can send it to you.

Coach Polly Mertens: 25:28

I got Iron man on that side. Over here I’m going to put Awesome.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 25:32

Team. Awesome, I think it side over here I’m going to put I think it’s a choice, I think you know we have choices. Get out of here. Step one is like wanting it for yourself right Like hello wanting it, believing that you can have it, and then stepping in and taking the steps Right. So that’s what I would say is how do we start? We start with choosing it Okay.

Coach Polly Mertens: 25:54

So we are hungry for it, we want it. We choose it for ourselves. Yes, I will choose this opportunity to create this lifestyle as, as this type of person, this way of being in the world, I will consciously choose to become, and be on the daily, an A-team player. Okay, how about you? And then we get on about the work. Well, I said a couple things and I’m glad that you preempted me there.

Coach Polly Mertens: 26:24

It also is important that you pick the right team and the right team leader, and not all of us have that much agency over our opportunities in our lives. For example, we don’t generally pick our families. I mean, some people do. It can be really tricky in a family environment. It can be really tricky in a work environment where we’re working for a paycheck, we’re trying to make a living here. Many people are working two jobs these days, with everything going on, and they don’t have the agency and the opportunity to say I don’t want to work for this guy anymore, with these people, they’re B’s, c’s and D’s right.

Coach Polly Mertens: 27:03

So we are going to talk about that. So I want to also say that that has to be a consideration going into this If I decide to be an A-team player in my family unit, in my community, in my workspace. How can I navigate that when maybe the leader is not creating a compelling vision, I don’t have buy-in to their goals and ideas, maybe I’m on a team of people that I don’t share their values, maybe people in my own family don’t share my same values? These are real life challenges. This is the real world, people, and many, many times those are the cases, and so I guess I want to also make sure we help people create an environment for themselves where they can still be an 18 player, even if their external circumstances the boss, the coworkers, the family are B’s, c’s and D’s. And, by the way, don’t go up to them and say you know, you’re a D.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 28:04

Step up, and I’m an A here. I’d like to see some A out of you. It’s been a while since you’ve been performing at your best, my boss.

Coach Polly Mertens: 28:17

Right. So we are going to be real about this and we’re saying that you know it’s not everybody is going on the US women’s soccer team, but anyway, ok, all right. Anyway, I want to say that how can you become an, a team player? Let’s pack it, unpack it, pack it, repack it again, whatever, so people can take the pieces that are most calling to them in today and become, you know, actionable about those items. So let’s say you can’t pick these things.

Coach Polly Mertens: 28:44

This is your present situation, and it’s not a yeah, it’s just the life that you’re living darling at this moment, and we love you for that. But let’s give you some opportunity anyway. Um, start with yourself, right? This is what you do have control over. Be honest about your own strengths and weaknesses and what you have to offer the team. So take a personal inventory what are your strengths and weaknesses and what do you have to offer the team? I think this is really important, because a lot of people show up into these environments or home life or whatever work life, and they’re not really being honest with themselves, right? So they’re presenting themselves as something that maybe they’re not, whether it’s their resume, their skillset, their value system. Like we said in the very beginning, we laid a foundation for this conversation. You’ve got to be honest about who you are in the world, what you value, what your standards are, what your skillset also is relevant there Like, what do you bring to the table? If you can’t be your true self walking into the environment, this is never going to work.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 29:50

I just I just got to call it. It’s not going to work Well, and I would flip it too, because I would wonder if, if we’re, if you’re sitting in that Petri dish of stew that I was just mentioning a little earlier, where you feel like you’re amongst a bunch of C players or something um call yourself out Like have you lowered your own standards to play with the?

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 30:12

C’s and recognizing that might be influencing why you don’t feel good is like I’m allowing my external circumstances, people to, to bring me down. I’m’m allowing it, I’m choosing not to play at my best because, because they’re not playing at their best, why should I bother? Well, you know, if it doesn’t matter to the boss or to them that I, you know, am my best, who cares right? And you get resigned. And you, you do c, quality work. Well, you’re never gonna feel good doing c when you’re capable of A period. So just take a look, that feels like crap what you just said.

Coach Polly Mertens: 30:51

Even me just thinking about it, and I’m sure I have absolutely been in those circumstances where I dialed back my own standards, values, desire for excellence, higher performance for myself, because of the nature of the environment I was in. I went into like nobody else here cares, so why should I care? And it felt like shit. I mean seriously.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 31:15

Totally drains the soul. I would guess that, even in the same environment, two different days. Day one, you’re doing what you’ve done, let’s say, and you’re around a bunch of C’s and you’re playing at a C. You go home at night and you feel drained less than why bother right. Day two, you come in and you say, god damn it, I don’t care if these C’s that’s the best they got, or maybe that’s their A and it’s a C to me, whatever. Yeah, I’m capable of more. I’m going to show what I’m fricking capable of. I’m going to do a all day today and if you fricking deliver your best, even if C is all you’re surrounded by and you go home that night, I’m sorry, but I think you’re going to feel a lot better within yourself, within your own body. Now it you know I don’t know where you’re going with this, but I have a feeling like could you live?

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 32:06

you know 10 years as an egg among seas. No, no, I don’t think that. I don’t think that’s also sustainable. I think at some point you gotta, you know, go we get around some damn a’s. I gotta get out and like I deserve to be around a’s. I could be at. You know, an a10 instead of a negative one, a because I’m pulling the team or trying for more.

Coach Polly Mertens: 32:28

What was great, though, that you pointed out ever so eloquently is the pain and the suffering that you feel mental, emotional and is the sign that your soul is dying in this environment. Okay, it could be your home life, it might be your work environment, it could be the community you live in. You know, if you’re a creative person and you don’t live in a creative space, there’s so many things where you just something doesn’t feel right and it starts out subtle and then it eats away at you. So this is really a call to action. If you are already having these experiences pangs, emotional, physical, however they’re manifesting please listen to them Right. So you have a greater calling. We believe in you, we believe in what is possible for you and your full potential, and it is time you start believing also.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 33:33

That’s a wake up call from the soul and we’re just here telling it to you in words, but you’ve been feeling it, whether it’s for a short time or a long time, and pick up the phone, soul’s calling oh geez, let me get that. What do you really want to tell me? Get out, okay, get out of that relationship, get out of that old body that you’re not living, you know, get out of the job that’s not feeding you. And you know, I think, if anything, you know and we’ll talk about buying another episode. But, like, so many people are in jobs that they call it active disengagement, or there’s active disengagement or just right out disengagement, right, I think the number is like 85% of people in the workforce. Yeah well, I’ve got some stats that will just blow your mind. That 85%, if you’re actively sorry, if you’re, I think, inactively disengaged means you’re going through the motions, like you’re just like showing up for the job or whatever. You’re not, like, oh, I’m going to leave, but I’m not giving my best. That is just this. Like muck and mire, you just haven’t made a decision. The people that are actively disengaged, ie looking for something else or have their radar on making plans.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 34:41

How could I create something more. You know I’m this, this is what my parents wanted me to be and I did it. It’s not what I want to be. Okay, am I looking at? Am I asking myself those deep questions? What do I truly want? How could I make that happen? Where do I need to go? What is my first? Even if you’re currently in a role or a situation, a relationship or something. But once you start the planning and the next steps, then you will start to feel life come back from your soul, because your soul is being heard and we talk about pivots transitions. It doesn’t have to be like a, you know, break your leg, get out of that company. You know, instantly go on unemployment. You know like don’t, don’t. You don’t necessarily have to do something that dramatic, but I think you’ll be more fulfilled if you start listening to the call of the soul and start doing, taking some steps towards it.

Coach Polly Mertens: 35:39

Yeah, because the soul wants to be an 18 player. And so how can that be the case? Soul wants to be an 18 player. And so how can that be the case? Well, understanding yourself right, your values, your standards, um, communication right. So, learning how to communicate. Maybe you’re not great at it, maybe you’ve been challenged with it, maybe you’ve just sat in silence, owning your own voice and truth. Woo, show up, be present, be engaged, even if there is resistance around you. You have value and you deserve to show up for yourself and the world. However they respond is up to them, right, but you’re in charge of that. Be accountable again to yourself and to your teammates. Be trustworthy. It’s really hard when somebody is not trustworthy to themselves. The obvious is when they’re not trustworthy to their teammates. I mean, that is an obvious thing, but sometimes people don’t even trust themselves.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 36:45

Well, I can raise my hand there as a former addict, you know just, you know you. I was doing things to myself that eroded my own trust and self-trust especially. So it it. It’s amazing how one little lack of self-trust moment can build on another one If we don’t stop it, you know, if we don’t stop that momentum in that direction, and that comes from a lack of confidence and a whole bunch of things that were just eating away at me. But notice, when you’re not being trustworthy with yourself because that slippery slope, it’s amazing how it erodes so much more in your life. So lack of self-trust is a root of this. You know leaves a lot of self-h, hate and yucky stuff. Okay, sorry, keep going, keep going.

Coach Polly Mertens: 37:29

And these are things we’re saying, like, if you really want to be an A-team player in your own life, these are foundational elements of your work. Yeah, everyday work. Right, I also have gathering the tools that are required to be really, you know, on that high performance team. What are the tools required for me to fill this role as a mother, as a partner, as a community leader, as a boss or as a teammate, depending on what my role might be on the team? Like I need to show up with some tools, some skills, some capabilities, some, right, like, what am I responsible for delivering here? And be real about what those things are, and gather those tools.

Coach Polly Mertens: 38:19

Yeah, right, like we’re not just winging this life. Unfortunately, I lived for many years just winging it right, like out of pure survival instinct that obviously didn’t serve me well and cost me in a lot of arenas. Right, we’re not winging it people. So gather the tools and show up. Be curious, yeah, be a learner, forever learner. Be a learner. And if you don’t know, and maybe you don’t have the tools, then be honest about it.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 38:47

Again, find somebody who does or ask for help.

Coach Polly Mertens: 38:49

Trust, all of the sort of foundational things. Do you have anything to add before we talk about what not to do?

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 38:58

The only thing I just had. I had this thing jump in my mind when I was talking about self-trust, that it’s a little bit tangential, but I just feel like I want to insert it here. So this was many years after I, you know, sort of rebounded from my addiction, if you will and I would I wonder what I would have looked like or how I would have acted years before in the same scenario. So I can remember when I was going to, this was a particular day at the gym and the gym was kind of these little classes and they’d give you like, do 14 reps of this and do 10 reps of this or whatever. And let’s say I was going to do you know X amount of pushups or something like that, right, and, and it we got hard. You know it was like, oh, you know, instead of you know it’s like 15 pushups, let’s just say that Right, instead of you know it’s like 15 pushups, let’s just say that right, or 10 barbell curls, or something like that.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 39:56

And it was like you know, and I’m like on eight or whatever and nobody’s counting my reps, nobody’s noticing if I’m on seven or nine or whatever. But I was, and when I let myself off the hook which I in in these moments. I was like that was eight I’m. I’ve got two more in me and even if I had to slow down and go, you know, take a breath, whatever nine, ten the amount of self. I just want to call it investment or worth or or some like something snapped in me when I did those reps, just for me. Nobody like I wasn’t. I didn’t look around and go. Did anybody see that? I just went yeah, girl, you did it Like yes, oh, my gosh.

Coach Polly Mertens: 40:36

CrossFit’s so good for this, because every workout is very specific and unique and the individual’s doing the workout, but you’re doing it in a team environment, right, right, right, but no teammates counting your reps or your time or whatever you are doing you, but you’re doing it with a group and same thing, like, if it’s 20 of these, well, who’s to say somebody didn’t do 18 or whatever? Fully self-responsible, self-accountable, self-trust, self-respect. I respect myself to deliver the goods for me today. And when you deliver the goods for yourself, your teammates become aware energetically and they deliver the goods. They deliver the goods.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 41:16

That moment of doing that for me I think it translates probably to like six or eight other values that are aligned with that and when I check that box with myself, like done girl right, like I remember when I was training for Spartans and I do a hundred burpees a day right In the bathroom, oh that’s fun, that was really fun. Yeah, not, but when I would do that it was like it was a vote for me.

Coach Polly Mertens: 41:45

Yeah, right, and I get what?

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 41:46

you’re saying it’s like who that? So if you do that at 6 am in the morning which you know, I would do these gym things at six o’clock in the morning I would vote for myself, I would walk out of there taller, more whatever, and I would go out into my day as an, a team player, to face to face anything that you know in the relationship, in whatever in the business or whatever. I’m up to interpersonal relationships, but I knew deep down who I was being for that fucking day. It changed radically every interaction I had right.

Coach Polly Mertens: 42:19

Yes, and what we’re saying at its core, that needs to be accentuated here.

Coach Polly Mertens: 42:27

We’re saying at its core, that needs to be accentuated here as we’re coming to, kind of the close of our day, our moment here. People have the choice, every action that they take from start to finish of their everyday life, to vote themselves as a team player. Yeah, you don’t need someone else to tell you who you are in this world. You know who you are and what you’re capable of, and you will show us by your actions, aka votes, that you are in fact an A-team player and you will build and build and build upon that until any B’s, c’s and D’s around you they’ll exit the building on their own. You don’t actually even need to leave the building. They will leave because you will command a space and attract 18 players. Right, they will be replaced by 18 players and you will continue to level up and level up in your own way, to level up and level up in your own way. And that is really the strength, the inner strength, and tenacity and resiliency and authenticity that we’re talking about. That’s real agency over yourself your life, your body.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 43:35

It’s magnetizing as well, just like you’re saying, like the energy. It’s like you’ve heard. You know this was before I think I ever heard that phrase. Champions do in private what it takes to be called champions in public. I hadn’t heard of that phrase before I did this and then I recognized I had this moment where I saw, like, do this rep or don’t do this rep, the only one that knows is you, me, boom. And it was like whoa, I get it. And it was like whoa, I get it.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 44:02

And then I totally get how champions can be so disciplined, passionate, on their own, in silence, in the gym, in darkness, right, and this can be in motherhood. This can be like you, with you, in your most intimate moments. Who you show up with for you is so pivotal, with who you will show up with for other people and in the world. So, absolutely, absolutely so. Just had to say that, sorry, so foundational, so foundational and I think so good, yeah, so, so good, so good. But I love what you’re saying. It’s a vote for yourself, vote for yourself. So your actions, it doesn’t matter who sees it or whatever. It’s more important the votes that you’re giving to yourself, for yourself, right.

Coach Polly Mertens: 44:50

Yeah, and we were going to talk about what a, b, c and D player are, but we’re not going to because we don’t need to.

Coach Polly Mertens: 44:58

We had a laundry list of things, what not to do. People know you smell it a mile away. People know you smell it a mile away. You see it, you and I have, like you know, these ultra radars up a. We want to be attracting 18 players into our space. We want to be with 18 players, but also we have been in the mud and the us ourselves have been B, c’s and D’s, maybe even F’s, over our lifetime in certain circumstances. So, energetically even. We have an awareness. Right, everybody does pay attention, right, pay attention. So we don’t have to say what not to do or what it looks like to be people now.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 45:39

And I just want to, you know, give people permission right now, because I, I think my life and I’m guessing your life as well has been a journey of not always being an A-team player A hundred percent, like I wouldn’t say that I came out of the womb or I was every day. I was an A-team player on every team I ever showed up. For you know like I’m not that fucking perfect, you know I’m not that perfect, it was an evolution, it was a growth. But who I am and who I’m not that perfect, it was an evolution, it was a growth. But who I am and who I’m committed to be now, and I and we all have weak moments. You know like I eat cookies, right, or whatever.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 46:10

You know, the thing is it’s like it’s not about being perfect, it’s about being your best self. It’s about being your best self. And, like you said, you know when you see it, you the A’s call forth to other A’s like yo, girl, I see you. You know like I was in a moment with my family recently and let’s just say there was a couple of queens like mother, daughter, sister, aunt, you know kind of in the room, and when we would see one, you know kind of letting her game down. It was like, girl, I see you, I see the queen that you are, I honor you. You’re not necessarily being your queen self, I just want to honor you, like it was a long story but anyway, but it was like queen to queen, like come on girl, like do you, you know not in a judgmental, shame way at all, not like, hey, I’m calling you on a behavior or whatever, just like I understand at your core who you are in the world.

Coach Polly Mertens: 47:04

you are an a and I want to be in a space and help you create a space for you to continue to be an a. Yeah, how can I support that path for you?

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 47:14

yeah, and what do you need? Or?

Coach Polly Mertens: 47:15

like are you? What do you need?

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 47:16

do you need to talk about something? Are you going through something? Are you, you know, and maybe it’s short and brief and that person snaps out of it, or they get over the hurdle that they put in front of themselves or whatever it is, um, and that’s okay and, like I said, my evolution I think your evolution has not where we’ve had moments of not being a team player. So I just want to create permission for people, wherever they are right now, if they’re listening to this and they’re not feeling they’re on an, a team, they’re being their best. Whatever it is, it’s okay and it’s possible and it’s available and it’s probably sorry, screaming at you, calling you. You know, the soul is there, ready to be reawakened, and I’m hoping out of this conversation you heard something that you’re like, oh yeah, right, like it’s time to reawaken the giant within kind of moment right.

Coach Polly Mertens: 48:07

Yeah, it’s not a performance metric. No it’s how you feel yeah. It’s how you feel yeah with yourself. Yeah, 100%, 100%. All right, let’s wrap this party up.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 48:20

Wow. So what is our one thing? Our one, what would you?

Coach Polly Mertens: 48:24

say. You know, to me, the one thing today is truly what you were summarizing. It’s a call to action to any individual listening right now to understand the opportunity that is their everyday opportunity. Everyday opportunity every day, every action, every choice, every decision. Am I stepping into my own full potential and becoming, and being an 18 player?

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 48:56

it’s an opportunity, so this is our invitation to them, right yeah, and I want to add to that a plus, which is and even if yesterday or this morning you weren’t feeling 18, tomorrow morning you can wake up and take one small step.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 49:09

It can start with one moment, one new behavior, one new action, one promise, one decision, whatever it is. Start it doesn’t have to be mind blowing, right. Make a mini decision with yourself, a change, a commitment, and act upon it and do it. That makes you feel like your best self, like you with. You are being your best self with yourself. Nobody else, who cares, who cares, nobody else will recognize that micro moment of shift, maybe you you you don’t watch a minute of TV, you don’t, you know, engage in, you know behaviors that that hurt you or whatever it is, but that’s you with you and you feel good with you because you’re, you’ve made that shift inside and you are the only one that knows it. For now, yeah, yeah.

Coach Polly Mertens: 49:53

And then take that energy out into the universe, where you will attract other A-team players.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 49:59

And build it.

Coach Polly Mertens: 50:00

Build that muscle and then build.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 50:04

Yeah, all right, I can’t wait till we continue this. So what do you want to remind our good friends here of? What do we want them to remember?

Coach Polly Mertens: 50:11

Quick before we close is there will be two more episodes maybe three, but definitely two speaking to our leaders yet again, of teams and how to build an A-team, and then we also will unpack in an episode if your team is broken and not performing at the level that they are capable of and you, as a leader, are capable of, how can you fix that? So we’re going to continue on this series because we have a lot to say about it.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 50:38

Can’t do it all in one, but that’s okay, we’re bite-sized pieces. Yes, it’s not.

Coach Polly Mertens: 50:41

So what I want to say to the audience, to our beautiful humans out there, is how your life looks is not as important as how it feels.

Coach Samantha Pruuitt: 50:52

And remember every day is your opportunity to find your awesome.